I have to say, that I was heartbroken to watch this scene. A part of me wanted to rewind to the earlier episodes where Louis and Lestat were head over heels in love. Another part of me wanted to scream at the television set, mostly because my dreams of seeing an authentic relationship played out on screen were completely shattered. I know, romance is formulaic, and redundant, but when it’s done right, it is all so satisfying. Then, I thought about the book, Interview with a Vampire, and realized that it wasn’t sizzing with hot scenes and romance. No, the book was all about how Louis loathed Lestat, and wanted to get as far away from him as possible. And after watching the series, I could pretty much understand why. Lestat, was a monster, especially when Louis had to endure his narcissistic rage. So, in this video, we are going to talk about what narcissistic rage is, the cycles of narcissistic rage, and how you can avoid the pitfalls. Please stay tuned.
The issue with many narcissist is that they are not fully mature. In other words, they behave very much like ancient cave men, ready and willing to clunk you over the head when you do something wrong.
If you identify as human, then you’d know that we’ve have inherited thousands upon thousands of years of memories from our cave man ancestors. These memories are so deeply impeded in our psyche, that they have become instinctual. Afterall, our cave man ancestors didn’t have the kind of problems that we have today. And they had simple solutions to handling things. If something hurt or offended them, they killed them, someone stole, they killed them. If someone didn’t contribute to the tribe, they killed them. And if someone slept with their wife or significant other, well yes, you guessed it, our cave man ancestors just killed them. To our ancestors, killing anyone who was threat was a simple solution to all of their problems. But if we fast forward to today, we know that we can’t just kill people, society would erupt into complete chaos, or we might find ourselves jailed, or worse, maimed or dead from our enemy’s retaliation.
As a result of this, we are conditioned to think before we speak, to take a few deep breaths when we get angry, so we don’t say things, or do things that we will later regret.
In short, we have been conditioned to control our emotions. Inherently, we understand that we don’t have control over other people. Only ourselves, and that if we allow our emotions to get the best of us, we may have to suffer the after effects and the dire consequences of our actions. Yet, the narcissist some how missed this memo. They are in a sense underdeveloped and still operating with the mind set of our cave man ancestors. They work tirelessly to try and control the outside world, and not the twisted fantasy that they have created within. And anybody who doesn’t align with their fantasy is considered a threat, and needs to be destroyed. And like a true cave man, they are going to clunk you over the head to get in line. Did you make or laugh at a joke at their expense? Clunk. Did you say something that bruised their fragile ego? Clunk? Did you offer constructive criticism? Clunk. Did you voice your concerns and emotions hoping to receive love or support? Clunk.
The narcissist needs to clunk you over the head, because you made them feel weak, inferior, and lonely. It was you, who brought out the worst in the narcissist, making him hit you, belittle you, and berate you with off hand jokes.
How the narcissist treats you is your fault. Afterall, you are the emotionally mature one. You are the one who evolved over the last thousand plus years, and thus you need to take responsibility for how the narcissist feels about you and himself. As a result of this, you need to walk on eggshells because you never know if you’re going to do something to trigger the narcissist. And if by chance you do something that really pisses him off. The narcissist goes into a fit of rage. Truth be told, not all narcissists are violent. But they all vengeful. And they may not all throw punches, but they all throw insults. And once they suffer a narcissist injury they are out for blood. And many of them may not be able to clunk you over the head. They will try and ruin you financially. They will try and destroy you spiritually. They will try to beat all of the self-worth and self-love out of you, through smear campaigns, isolation, guilt, and threats.
The narcissist is just a modern day cave man, who puts people in their place by clunking them over the head. They can never change.
They operate with an outdated cave man way of thinking that doesn’t allow them to take responsibility for their own actions, much less self-reflect and admit that what they said or did was wrong. Worse, the narcissist is always in survival mode. And little threats are atoned to a saber tooth tiger breathing down their neck. They have to destroy you, because your destruction is based on their survival. You think that they would feel remorse after an episode of narcissistic rage. They don’t. They just miss the value that you used to provide. They miss the energy that they used to suck out of you, and will work to lure you back to their side. Keep in mind that the narcissist doesn’t love you. Most of the time, he doesn’t even like you. The narcissist on the other hand does need you. He needs you to be his supply and of course his emotional punching bag. That’s why it’s important to pay attention to the red flags early in the relationship. Remember, how people treat you is how they feel about you. Don’t let little things slide. Don’t make excuses for bad behavior. The narcissist is slowly going to test your limits, and you have to let them know early on that you’re no punching bag.
